4th Sunday of Ordinary Time: Integrity In Our State Of Life

Today's second reading comes from the 7th chapter of Saint Paul's First Letter to the Corinthians. The chapter begins with the words: “Now in regard to the matters about which you wrote…” Based upon what follows, it’s clear the Christians of Corinth had sent him questions regarding marriage, but also about what life looks like for those who are not married: single people, widows, and celibates. From his response, we can also extrapolate that some of them perceived marital relations to be evil, and that celibacy or virginity was the only acceptable state for a Christian.

Paul goes on to state that there is no problem with marriage, but calls married people to do so with integrity. But then he goes on to speak about two states of life that, perhaps it’s fair to say, are not often talked about and which I believe, tend to be misunderstood: virginity and celibacy.

It seems that in our time and place, these states of life tend to regarded as pitiable and maybe even, unnatural, because after all, God made us as sexual beings, and with that, gave us bodily appetites. Even more, we acknowledge our inherent need for intimacy and love, needs that many presume are not fulfilled in those states of life. The misunderstanding is furthered, in that we tend to equate sex with love, and because none of us can really live happily without love, we therefore presume we can’t live happily without sex. I would argue instead that virginity and celibacy can reveal how God’s love alone, is capable of fully satisfying the human heart.

But I can understand the perceptions. It makes me think of a line from an artsy, high-culture film, Nacho Libre. The main character, a Mexican Franciscan friar, played by Jack Black (clearly not a Latino), is speaking to a group of orphan boys who regard professional luchadores (wrestlers) as heroes. In trying to convey that religious life is even better than being a luchador: “Niños. My life is good….real good. I get to sleep alone in a bed every night for the rest of my life….it’s fantastic!” Again, I understand the perceptions.

Our faith declares that marriage functions in this world to serve as a visible sign of God’s love, by how the spouses love each other, that it’s a sign of the heavenly wedding and that it reflects the inner-life of the Holy Trinity, in how husband and wife can give way to the gift of children. There’s no overstating its beauty and importance. But Paul, who infers that he lives a celibate life (7:7-8), describes that virginity and celibacy frees one for God in a particular way, allowing one to focus on God in a way that can’t so easily happen within the necessary demands of marriage, beautiful as those demands are.

For myself, as a celibate, I bear in mind Jesus’ words: “No one can serve two masters” (Matthew 6:24). If I had a wife and a family—there’s no question—it would reshape my spiritual life, and further, you all would not hold the same place in my heart and in my life as you do.

Let’s be honest, there’s something powerful and beautiful about the single-person who chooses to fight that fight, to remain pure and chaste, even if our society snickers at it, even if the persistent message and social pressures tell us to just go for it. It’s sad that we don’t encourage it more. There’s something beautiful about one desiring to be pure and being supported in that desire.

I spoke about St. Paul a week ago in the weekly newsletter. I mentioned how after his conversion, he became radically Christ-focused. Everything was considered with Jesus in mind, including today’s message about the various states of life: whether one is married, single, widowed or called to celibacy, do it with Christ at the heart of it. What I hear St. Paul saying throughout this seventh chapter is to live within our states of life with integrity and wholeness, and to do so first, with a focus on Christ.

Otherwise, we’ve got it backwards. Our state of life is not what shapes who Jesus is in our lives, but instead, it’s the opposite. If we’re not rooted in him first, it is undoubtedly more difficult to properly understand the purpose of and the dynamic within marriage, widowhood, virginity or celibacy. Without Christ first, we can so easily drift outside the lines of our state of life, into the others, which tends to prove dangerous and destructive.

A priest once described it this way: “My celibacy is a gift to the married, and the married are a gift to me, and together we reflect the glory of God. Our gifts are complementary and necessary for each other”.[1] May the Lord Jesus bless us in our state of life, and be our strength in our call to holiness and purity, in soul and body.

[1] Montague, George T.. First Corinthians (Catholic Commentary on Sacred Scripture). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.